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PASSIONATE PURSUIT
  by Victoria Boyson
  www.boyson.org


  "The eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth
  to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him"
  2 Chr. 16:9.

I had a vision in which I was flying with God over the surface of the
earth. We circled it at a tremendous rate of speed, causing everything on
the earth's surface to appear as if it were one massive blur. Then, after
some time we slowed down our flight and zoomed in to one lone woman who was
on her knees crying out to God is desperation. I saw the Lord stand in
front of this woman gazing down at her, but she did not seem to know He was
there. As she prayed, the Lord breathed deeply to take in the fragrance of
her prayers. He closed His eyes and raised His head; His chest heaved
deeply as he inhaled the beauty of her prayers.

As He breathed in her prayers a radiant light began to emanate from inside
Him. The light seemed to be electrified with waves of power surging through
it. It burst out from Him and encircled both He and the woman in what
seemed like a cocoon of glorious light. As I watched, I marveled at this
remarkable moment and the Lord spoke to me and said, "It was her
desperation for Me that drew Me to her."

In this vision, as we traveled around the earth straining to find someone
whose heart was longing for Him, I felt the Lord's desperation. He was
desperate to find one who was yearning for Him - someone whose heart was
reaching out to find the One they love.

"They Want Me!"

I took part in a church service where the intensity of our worship was very
high; you could feel the fervency of our longing for our Lord heightening.
Many people were crying out to God in desperate anticipation of Him. "Come
Lord Jesus! You are welcome here!" they cried. As our worship increased our
longing for Him intensified.

I felt in my spirit that the Lord was truly moved by our desire for Him. He
spoke to my heart like an emotional bridegroom, "Look Victoria, they want
me!" He was enthralled by our longing for Him.

I burst into tears with my head in my hands, not because I was sorrowful,
but because He was so happy. I was delighted for Him, delighted to see His
heart made so full by the sincere and fervent worship of those He loved so
much. It was as though at last we were beginning to want Him as much as He
had longed for us.

Our hearts were captivated by Him because we were suddenly made aware of
our great need of Him and of the empty longing we had inside of us without
Him. We felt His desperation and His love for us. We knew that He wanted to
be with us and our response to Him was "Come!"

Who is it You are Looking For?

In John 20:10-18, John tells us of one whose heart was fully committed to
the Lord. To Mary Magdalene, Jesus was not just the Savior of the world,
but to her He was a friend. And to this woman who had lived a difficult,
forlorn and rejected existence, He represented hope, faithfulness and love.
He was the only one who had treated her with love and respect. He made her
feel that she really mattered to Him. Instead of seeking what He could take
from her, He poured His life into her, and so she loved Him.

When Jesus was crucified and buried, it was she who woke before the sun to
run to His tomb (John 20:1). And it was she who stayed by His tomb crying
when they could not find His body. When the two angels stationed at the
tomb asked her why she was crying she replied, "'They have taken my Lord
away,' she said, 'and I don't know where they have put him'" (v.13). She
was not confounded by the sight of the angels before her. Indeed, her only
thought was for her Lord.

When Jesus appeared to her she did not recognize Him. "'Woman,' He said,
'Why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?'" "Thinking He was the
gardener, she said, 'Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you
have put Him, and I will get Him.'"
  (John. 20:14-15).

Mary's Passion

Let's pause here for a moment and refresh our minds with reflections of
Mary's relationship with Jesus. In Luke 8:2 we find that she was one whom
the Lord had cast out seven demons and she followed Him from that time on.
She had refused to be moved from her place at His feet by her sister Martha
(Luke 10:40). She, in John 12:1-8 anointed Jesus for His death with
expensive perfume and wiped His feet with her hair. Then, in John 19:25, we
learn she was at the foot of the cross and saw the one she loved tormented
and killed.

I can not imagine what it must have been like for her, watching Him hanging
on the cross and then ultimately die. Imagine the dazed confusion she must
have experienced. Questions rushing through her mind; Is this what He meant
when He said something would happen to Him? Was this what He was talking
about? She must have wondered if it was all a bad dream...or how it could
possibly be happening to Him.

None of that seemed to mattered at that moment. All she knew was that the
One she loved was dying. Then He was gone, how could she go on without Him?
She carried all of this emotional heartache with her to the tomb on that
Sunday morning.

Yearning only to see even just His lifeless form, she rushed to the tomb
the very moment it was permissible. And when she arrived, she found more
heartache still...His body was missing. This was too much for her to take;
she could no longer bear it. Under the weight of her grief she broke down
and wept.

Drawn by Her Passion

Jesus had yet to present Himself to His Father, but He was drawn by Mary's
passionate grief for Him. So He went back to the tomb. "Mary" He said in
John 20:16. He had planned to present Himself to His disciples in His
glorified body, but He choose instead to appear first to this broken woman.

Not even His own mother whom He dearly loved would see Him first, but to a
despondent woman whose heart was in desperate pursuit of Him would He first
appear. However, she did not recognize Him...so He asked her, "Who is it
you are looking for?" (v.15).

He knew who she was looking for; He did not need to ask her. Her passionate
grief for Him was what had drawn Him to her, and Jesus wanted to hear her
say it. He wanted to hear who it was she was searching for.

He wanted to hear her say, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me
where you have put him, and I will get him" (v.15). How her words must have
revived Him. From the arms of His accusers, to the passionate pursuit of
His friend.

She wanted Him desperately, even though she believed He was dead. "Just
tell me where I can find him and I will take care of him." There was
nothing she could do to help Him while He was on the cross, so she urgently
wished to help Him now.

Jesus could stand it no longer and in earnest He revealed Himself to her.
"'Mary' He said. 'Rabboni!' she cried." She had searched for His body, but
now she finds Him whole. From desperation and agony to exuberant joy! She
had found the One whom her soul longed for.

In her passion, she lunged at Him embracing Him. Jesus said, "Do not hold
on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father"(v.17), but she could
not restrain herself. The dark night that she lived through had past and
her morning had come.

"I will be Found by You"

The Lord is looking for those who passionately seeking Him, whose hearts
are fully devoted to Him, who love Him. He is desperately looking for those
like Mary who, in their brokenness, are in desperate pursuit of Him, who
want to be with Him. When He finds one who is seeking Him, it becomes a
fragrance to Him and He is drawn to them.

Our Lord is desperately searching over the face of the earth for those who
long for Him. He wants to reveal Himself to them and to commune with them,
to be one with them.

Our Lord promises that He will be found by those who are in passionate
pursuit of Him. "'You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all
your heart. I will be found by you,' declares the Lord"
  (Jeremiah 29:13-14).

The One your heart longs for will come to you! Turn your eyes towards Him
beloved, He is desperate for you.